“You said that this carpet had enough whatevers to make it across the sea!”
“Yeah, but I was lying.”
“Fair enough. Can you take care of my pets till I get back? I might be stuck on this island for a while.”


Some say that the krakens won’t eat you if you manage to keep them properly entertained. Others don’t say anything at all. Presumably because they’ve been eaten by the krakens. However, some others disagree and say that it is more likely that they are simply on vacation or have taken a vow of silence to appease the tallest waves. On the other hand, and no, I have no idea whose hand we are talking about at this point, maybe they took a vow of silence, went on a vacation, and got eaten by the krakens. They say you can’t do it all, but who are they anyway, and did they get eaten by the krakens? I say yes.


Can’t decide on what color you dream boat should be? No problem, just get a color changing boat. Satisfaction guaranteed. Disclaimer: Color changing boats may attract sharks, mermaids, and medium sized krakens.

Another Day at Sea


I invited the sun over for tea. But the moon showed up instead. Said, the sun was busy counting all the stars. The moon didn’t want to talk about sports or politics. The moon didn’t want to talk at all. Not even about the moon. So we sipped our tea politely, and then the moon left to teach the tides.



I mean, like seriously? How am I  to know if I got up on the wrong side of bed when I wake up on a pile of rocks? At least my pajamas aren’t too embarrassing.